Wednesday, January 27, 2010

so blue...

I have a minor obsession with blue. Okay, so it isn't so much minor as major.  I would love to paint every wall in my house a different shade of blue and buy blue furniture like this gorgeous blue crate and barrel sofa below:



I need this couch in my life.  I need this room in my life.  This photo hails from a funky eclectic LA home tour on apartmenttherapy.com.  To see the full house tour (which I absolutely love) click here
This couch is selling for $1,000 in LA but I can't have it because they won't ship it.  Anyone want to make a quick trip to LA with me for a pick up?



Thursday, January 14, 2010

We somehow go on

In the wake of the terrible tragedy that has beset the people of Haiti, I have done a lot of praying.  Praying to understand why such things happen, in particular in areas that always seem to have so much already against them.  Homelessness, political turmoil, starvation. A prayer for the suffering.  A prayer for families of lost loved ones.  A prayer for doctors and medical personnel desperately attempting to reach and treat the thousands upon thousands of wounded.  A prayer for their government and for ours, that we may find the resources to aid our tiny, crippled, shattered neighbor. 
While researching ways I could help from the comfort of my computer at my office desk, I found a poignant article that touched me.  It comes from the Miami Herald, and I want to share it:

Cruel as it is, we somehow go on

lpitts@MiamiHerald.com

Sometimes, the earth is cruel.
That is ultimately the fundamental lesson here, as children wail, families sleep out of doors, and the dead lie unclaimed in the rubble that once was Port-au-Prince.
Sometimes the rains fall and will not stop. Sometimes the skies turn barren and will not rain. Sometimes the seas rise and smack the shoreline like a fist. Sometimes the wind bullies the land. And sometimes, the land rattles and heaves and splits itself in two.
Sometimes, the earth is cruel.
And always, when it is, we do the same thing. We dig ourselves out. We weep and mourn, we recover and memorialize the dead, we rebuild our homes. And we go on. This is the price of being human. And also,
arguably, the noblest expression.
Sometimes, the earth is cruel, and you have no choice but to accept that as part of the bargain called life. And when it is your turn to deal with it, you do.
But what if it's always your turn?
Surely some homeless, dust-streaked Haitian can be forgiven for thinking it is always Haiti's turn this morning, two days after the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere saw its capital city smashed by the strongest earthquake it has ever known, a 7.0-magnitude monster. Surely, the rest of us watching from afar, experiencing tragedy and devastation from the comfort of desk chairs and living room couches, are tempted to believe the same thing.
Bad enough, Haiti is wretchedly poor. Bad enough it has a history of political instability and colonialism, of being ignored by the major powers when it is not being exploited by them. Bad enough, all that, yet at the end of the day, those are disasters authored by human hands, by human greed, human corruption, human economic predation.
Sometimes, though, you have to wonder if the planet itself is not conspiring against this humble little nation.
After 1994, when Tropical Storm Gordon killed several hundred people, after 1998, when Hurricane Georges swept away over 500 lives, after 2004, when the rains of Tropical Storm Jeanne claimed over 2,000 souls, after 2005, when Hurricane Dennis took 25 lives in July and Tropical Storm Alpha snatched 17 in October, followed by Hurricane Wilma which stole 11 more, after the double whammy of Hurricanes Fay and Gustav in 2008 killed over 130 people and destroyed over 3,100 homes, after all that, comes this latest insult -- and a death toll officials cannot begin to even imagine. Perhaps as many as 100,000, they were saying on Wednesday.
Sometimes, the earth is cruel. To crawl the planet's skin, scanning for tornadoes in Oklahoma, charting storm tracks in Florida, running from wildfires in California, is to understand this in a primal, personal way. It is to breathe a prayer that begins, ``There, but for the grace of God . . . '' It is to write relief checks, donate blood, volunteer material and time and to fear, even in the doing, that these gestures are small against the need, inconsequential against the ache of a people whose turn seems never to end.
But what else are you going to do? As the playwright put it, your arms too short to box with God. Even less have we the ability to answer the question that burns the moment: Why are the most vulnerable repeatedly assessed the highest price?
We are hamstrung by our own limitations, so we can only do what we always do, only send prayers and help. And watch, staggered by the courage it takes, as Haitians do what human beings always do, the thing at which they have become so terribly practiced.
Dig out. Weep and mourn. Memorialize the dead. Rebuild. Go on. And show the world once again a stubborn insistence on living, despite all the cruelties of the earth.


The Earth is cruel and oftentimes a fist is raised at God, angry and bewildered with the unanswerable question of: "why me?".  I will never know such tragedy.  I will most likely never suffer the way the people of Haiti have suffered. Over and over and over again.  But what can we do but send prayers, write relief checks, volunteer and watch, as the Haitians do what we human beings were meant to do on this earth:  Endure.  And somehow, they go on.

My heart goes out to all affected by this calamity. If only I could do more.  so much more.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

You can find me down river

Most days I wonder why I still live in the States.  At least five times a day, I wonder why I'm not somewhere else, doing something else in some other country far far away from this place.  I truly do belong in another land.
If any of you need me,  I will be down river somewhere, lost in a world I so desperately wish to return to, attempting to find purpose in the day to day.
While I daydream, please dip into the photos that float me downstream, to my castle in the jungle:

Headed down to the Heliconia Lodge

Peaceful lagoon on the Amazon

The Heliconia Lodge, owned by the incredible Carlos Acosta


The Lodge rests up on stilts, like a tree house.  This is the hammock room, the best seat in the house during a nightly rainstorm.

another view of the hammock room

on the boat with some of the mentors of the group

we received a visit from a baby caiman

Building a new Library for Santa Rosa village.  Population: about 700


Painting the library








teaching about germs while making sock germ hand puppets


teaching the secondary kids


found a litter of puppies.  they had fleas. didn't care, held them anyway.  got flea bites.

the sweetest boy who ever lived and an early morning jungle hike with Amanda, our guide and myself


our farewell plaque to the village leaders


my boyfriend, Jean-Pier.  He gets bigger every year.

A super emotional farewell.  I cried the whole boat ride home


The amazing staff at the lodge.  All dear friends





The peaceful amazon


going...


going...


gone.


I pray everyday that my road of life will lead me back here. Til then, I have these photos,  my memories. and my daydreams.




Friday, November 20, 2009

The Purpose of a Dog



"My goal in life is to be the kind of person my dogs thinks I am."

I love dogs.  From the time I was a little girl all I ever wanted was a dog.  I asked for a dog every Christmas, Birthday and gift-giving holiday from the time I was about 5 on, to no avail.  I received a series of other "pets", namely hamsters (stinky and lame), parakeets (don't do tricks, just poop and eat and chirp) and a bunny (my sis Tara and I tried to walk the bunny like a dog once and ended up getting clawed until we bled.  Not a pleasant experience for either one of us.  I have held a grudge against bunnies since that day), but nothing could replace my incessant desire for a dog.

I have three dogs now. Liddy (technically our family dog) that was brought home by my sister without permission and is now the ruler or my parent's household and a family treasure, Molly, my wild, neurotic but ridiculously sweet Vizsla that came to me via Ben for Christmas during our engagement and after the purchase of our first home, and Leonard, my teeny tiny weenie dog that was intended to keep Molly company and satisfy my desire to forever hold a dog in my arms and cuddle with something that would never get big. My dogs are my friends.  My dogs are my family.











Now, for those of you that aren't dog lovers and don't understand the obsession, let me share with you a story that Ben sent me in an email yesterday, defining the purpose of a dog through the explanation of a 6 yr. old:

A Dog's Purpose(from a 6-year-old).

Being a veterinarian, I had been called to examine a ten-year-old Irish Wolfhound named Belker. The dog's owners, Ron, his wife Lisa, and their little boy Shane, were all very attached to Belker, and they were hoping for a miracle.

I examined Belker and found he was dying of cancer. I told the family we couldn't do anything for Belker, and offered to perform the euthanasia procedure for the old dog in their home.

As we made arrangements, Ron and Lisa told me they thought it would be good for six-year-old Shane to observe the procedure. They felt as though Shane might learn something from the experience.

The next day, I felt the familiar catch in my throat as Belker 's family surrounded him. Shane seemed so calm, petting the old dog for the last time, that I wondered if he understood what was going on. Within a few minutes, Belker slipped peacefully away.

The little boy seemed to accept Belker's transition without any difficulty or confusion. We sat together for a while after Belker's Death, wondering aloud about the sad fact that animal lives are shorter than human lives..
 

Shane, who had been listening quietly, piped up, ''I know why.''

Startled, we all turned to him. What came out of his mouth next stunned me. I'd never heard a more comforting explanation. It has changed the way I try and live..

He said,''People are born so that they can learn how to live a good life -- like loving everybody all the time and being nice, right?'' The Six-year-old continued,
 ''Well, dogs already know how to do that, so they don't have to stay as long.''


My dogs are always happy to see me, whether I have been gone five days or just five minutes.  THey always greet me with tails wagging.



Here are a few things we could all learn from man's best friend:

Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure Ecstasy.

Take naps.

Stretch before rising.

Run, romp, and play daily.

Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

Avoid biting when a simple growl will do..

On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

When you're happy, dance around and wag your entire body.

Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

Be loyal.

Never pretend to be something you're not.

If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by, and nuzzle them gently.

ENJOY
 EVERY MOMENT OF EVERY DAY! 


I'm going to go home now and give my dogs a hug.






Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Mellow Pensivity

I'm into uber depresso music as of late. I blame it on the weather change. Shorter days, long dark nights, the looming 7 months or so of winter always manages to swallow me. Here are the latest doleful songs dominating my headphones:

  • Sanders Bohlke- "The Weight of Us"
  • Iron and Wine- "Faded from the Winter"
  • Bonnie Prince Billy- "Hard Life"
  • Coeur de Pirate- "Intermission"
  • Andrew Bird- "Lull"
  • Karen O and the Kids- "Hideaway"
  • Jose Gonzalez- "How Long"
  • Kings of Convenience- "Gold in the Air of Summer"
  • Way Out West- "Don't Forget Me"
  • Rogue Wave- "Christians in Black"
Check em' out.  You can find most of these on emusic.com

    Wednesday, November 11, 2009




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    Friday, November 6, 2009

    It's a Pablo Neruda Day

    The Stolen Branch

    In the night we shall go in
    to steal
    a flowering branch.

    We shall climb over the wall
    in the darkness of a private garden,
    two shadows in the shadow.

    Winter is not yet gone,
    and the apple tree appears
    suddenly changed
    into a cascade of fragrant stars.

    In the night we shall go in
    up to its trembling firmament,
    and your little hands and mine
    will steal the stars.

    And silently,
    to our house,
    in the night and the shadow,
    with your steps will enter
    perfume's silent step
    and with starry feet
    the clear body of spring.

    En Espanol:

    La Rama Robada

    En la noche entraremos
    a robar
    una rama florida.

    Pasaremos el muro,
    en las tinieblas del jardin ajeno,
    dos sombras en la sombra.

    Aun no se fue el invierno,
    y el manzano aparece
    convertido de pronto
    en cascada de estrellas olorosas.

    En la noche entraremos
    hasta su tembloroso firmamento,
    y tus pequenas manos y las mias
    robaran las estrellas.

    Y sigilosamente,
    a nuestra casa,
    en la noche y la sombra,
    entrara con tus pasos
    el silencio paso del perfume
    y con pies estrellados
    el cuerpo claro de la primavera.